Sunday, September 13, 2009

I'm Enjoying My Cupcake, Are You?

WOW, either I am a way too relaxed as a mom or some moms (and dads) just need to let go. I love my friend, dearly, but she is way too uptight. Being a mom is supposed to be fun, hard work, but fun!

This past Saturday, my lil man and myself went to my friend's son's birthday, he just turned one. My son will be two next month. He can walk, climb, run, feed himself, talk, express all of his needs verbally (even when I don't want him to:)), and is VERY independent. At their house he was the only kid, aside from the birthday boy.

When we arrived my friend told me that there was food in the kitchen. My son is a very picky eater and I knew the only thing he would eat was the fruit. They had grapes, strawberries, and watermelon - all of his faves! I made him a plate. He went to sit at the table and everyone was like, "will he eat those grapes - like that (they were whole, I don't cut them b/c he won't eat them cut!)" "will he just sit there, he won't fall or try to get up (nope, he sits at the table cuz he was taught manners)". Oh, and he climbed up into the chair on his own and they about had a heart attack. Freaking out I tell ya. Running to him and looking at me as if I was a horrible mother that I would allow my son to climb up into the dining room chair all on his own. Umm, he climbs on a daily basis. He is a boy. He is a toddler. AND, we frequent the park A LOT. His climbing skills are superb! He can manage. If he falls, well, then he learns what not to do next time.

Right!?! Please tell me if I am wrong. In case you didn't read in one of the previous paragraphs, my son is independent. If I were to help him get into the chair when he has already taken it upon himself to get in there he would have had a temper tantrum. Then I could forget about him eating the fruit. But...

What I want to know is when do parents let go and let their child figure things out on their own? Me, I have done this pretty much since my son was born. I mean, of course, I was telling him to change his diaper or anything. I am talking about when he started batting at his toys, then reaching for them, then grabbing them, then manipulating them, then rolling over, then sitting up, then crawling, then walking... catchin' my drift? I mean, I was there to guide him, of course, and show him at first but he is the one who had to figure it out. If I kept on "showing" him, he would not learn or possibly learn at a slower rate. Or, become way too dependent. Not saying being dependent is a bad thing, but too much of anything is bad.

I haven't even told you the best part yet! My son was sitting at the table and the my friend's husband was in the chair next to my son. My son was playing with the candles that were on the cake (no, they weren't lit). They had some icing on them. My son put his hand on my friend's husband's shorts and he about had a heart attack right then and there. I kid you not! He FREAKED because there was now a very, teeny, tiny, small amount of icing on his jean shorts. Really!?!? Do you not have a washing machine??!! Or are you guys strict with when clothing can be washed too?!!? I didn't say anything to him. I just let it go (bravo me *patting self on the back*) and felt very sorry for their little boy. What else could I do?

Any way, if you are wondering why I am posting about this it is for this simple reason: We cannot enjoy life if we are so focused on the smallest of crumbs because life is more than just a crumb, it's a cupcake. Warm, gooey, and delicious when eaten in full. Please try to enjoy your cupcake, who knows when it will be gone or if there will be more.

Now, on to what my son likes to do... he likes to remove all of the cushions from the couch and place them on the floor. He likes to jump on them and say, "bounce!" Then, he also likes to chill on them. Look how frickin' cute he is:) Yes, I am biased, but I'm allowed to be!!!  (sorry about quality, taken with phone)

As always, thanks for reading. Let me know if there is something you get irritated with about other parents, or something you admire in other parents and wish you could be more like!


blueviolet said...

You're following your son's lead and isn't that what we're supposed to do? We're not supposed to hold them back just because of our comfort levels, especially if they're fully capable of doing something.

You're doing the right thing and you're clearly a great mom. He's precious, by the way.

Ydorj said...

LOL, hi Jen. Yes those parents are way too uptight. He really looks like he's having a ball there. You're always so well written. Never a dull read. Keep loving life my friend.

Peggy said...

He is adorable!!
I am following you now!

luvincowgirl said...

You're definitely doing the right thing. I think those parents need to chill. Talk about helicopter parenting, geez!

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